Entry 1: Grief.

damn it, damn it, damn it

why?

how?

drew just randomly goes nuts a week ago and were all supposed to move on?

he was fine until now

what the fuck even happened?

i know his deadbeat dad went nuts too

but drew told me that was underlying and was only triggered after he turned old

and he had suffered from years of psychosis before that

did drew just snap? without any signs?

no, there would at least be some signs of delusion

drugs?

no, thats not like him

god

why him, of all people

the last week has been so damn heavy

i dream of him coming back and hopping on the couch and playing a game with me

it just makes me wake up feeling worse

i feel so god damn alone

stranded

it hurts

i know theres something else

but what?

this kind of shit doesnt just "happen"

i know it wasnt just some sort of "random coincidence"

...

he left his computer on

maybe i could figure something out by looking through it

couldnt hurt to try